SOB of the Week

WEST VIRGINIA may indeed have plenty of “Wild, Wonderful” things for visitors to do, but driving through it shouldn’t be so heavy on the “Wild” part. You can’t blame the state for the snowy weather we encountered or the winding, high-elevation Interstates, which are actually quite amazing feats of construction. What West Virginians can be blamed for, however, is that they have no idea how to drive.

Around me, at least.

In the more mountainous areas, one can’t drive very badly for long – the steep inclines, icy bridges and endless gorges would sort the wheat from the chaff after a few trips to and from the local DQ. My problem is that, while probably quite talented alone on the road, West Virginians do not play well with others. In the middle of a snow squall, while squealing around a switchback at a 5 percent gradient and 1000 feet of rock on either side, THERE IS NO NEED TO RIDE MY ASS when I’m going 75 mph.

Additionally, when the terrain flattens out between Charleston and Huntington, drivers follow the “don’t move until you see the whites of their eyes” maxim when making a turn across two lanes of oncoming traffic. Good for preserving musket-balls, bad for preserving your own. As I am writing this, we’re in the pitch black Kentucky night on the highway, several hours behind schedule and in desperate need of about seven beers apiece. My knuckles are still white from fighting for lane space with trucks held together with duct tape, about two hours behind schedule.

Thanks. I’m never coming back again.

Posted by rj3 at December 14, 2004 10:43 PM

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Posted by: JK at December 15, 2004 10:45 AM

Posted by: Smith at December 15, 2004 1:11 PM

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